DETONATION

So we've been smacking talking each other for a few weeks, knowing that, soon, in the very near future, one of us will emerge as victor and be able to boast and gloat of our spoils until our paths cross again.    Well, today was the day we drew our guns.  Unloaded our arsenal, and showed each other our true cards.

It was innocent enough.  We decided to take part in the Triple Crown for Heart, an untimed charity ride that

sees over a 150 cyclists climb Vancouver's local mountains, starting with Seymour, followed by Grouse, before finally ending up at the downhill area of Cypress Mountain.  After each ascent, we would trace a path to the bottom of Marine Drive before climbing back up to the top.  Fair enough; untimed, charity, non-competitive............I like climbing, this'll be fun, and the fact that proceeds go to support the cardiology patients at Children's Hospital makes the ride that much more palatable.

This will be fun.

Almost on cue, my 16 month old son decided to have a bad morning.  A poor sleep resulted in a fussy,  grumpy tiresome morning.  Gah, no worries.  I'll just hurry to get to the start area.  I made it to the registration table, signed in, pinned my number on, and I'm only 5 minutes away from the start, phew.  Good timing.

Rolling out,  the 'neutral' start was anything but neutral.  I notice guys I normally race against swarming the lead car, as if to say 'hurry up, let's get this show on the road.'  I react, and make my way towards the front of the group (can't get left behind before this thing even starts, right?).  Turning left on to Mt. Seymour Drive, the lead car accelerates and lets the pack loose.  WHAT THA?  Charity ride?  Untimed? So much for a fun, social day of climbing.  Game on.

As the road pitches to the sky, just past the ranger hut, the group is already comprised of a few select riders; a handful of category 1 and 2 riders, including the former Masters Hill Climbing Champion, Larry Zimich.  As the pace surges, I do my best to keep who I think is the best climber at bay.  Jumping on to his wheel, the pack shatters within the first 4 of 5 kilometers of the climb.  Passing the Baden Powell trail crossing, the road spikes with a steep, gentle right hand corner, almost custom made for an attack.  BOOM!  Sure enough, my mate throws it down, accelerating from an already wicked pace.  Pop, pop, pop. You can almost hear the riders being shelled, failing to respond to the increased pace.

We're now down to two or three riders as we enter the first switchback (I can't really remember, my eyeballs were oozing pain and stinging with lactic acid).  As the road levels out, I try to recover, but feel my nemesis accelerate again.  This is ridiculous.  I react, and respond with an acceleration of my own.  An eye for an eye, buddy boy.

The last acceleration created a gap. I need to hold on to this!  With everything that I have, I try to accelerate again.  It worked, the gap has grown!  I settle into an uncomfortable rhythm and try to focus on delivering the maximum amount of power.  I don't look back for fear of seeing another rider come up on me.  2nd switch back....3rd....4th, I peer down to see where the other riders are...nobody....keep going!  Turning the final left-hand switch back, I know there's only a few minutes of agony left.  Let's go!  I get out of the saddle and make the final climb to the parking - and almost fall over when I reach the top.  38:30.  Not bad for a single effort, but I know that two more mountains await.  Crap.  Did I burn too many matches on the first climb?

Nemesis Bob and I quickly descend and make our way over to Grouse.  A controlled climb, we reach the top within 20 seconds of each other, fair enough.   Back down, over the Capilano River, and back up the last of the three mountains. 

I recently set a PR climbing Cypress, so I felt reasonably confident.  I can hang with Bob.

Existing the highway, in a rotating paceline, we time trail past the works yard, and start our final ascent.  Looking down at my speedo, we're doing 22km/h as we hit the slope.  Whoa, that's pretty ambitious, I remember thinking.  That's single mountain climbing speed.  I'm on Bob's wheel.  He flicks an elbow as if to say 'you take the lead for a while'  I react, pull through, then ask the engine bay for more power.  The Captain of the engine bay responds, but whispers into my ear - I'm afraid we're already at full power, sir!  Somehow, in my focused state, I didn't hear his warning.  After a few seconds, I flick my elbow, motioning Bob to take a pull at the front.  Good, good, this is all coming to plan.  Until..............Bob accelerates again.  In a split second, I'm out of my saddle reacting to his acceleration, only nothing........NOTHING?  Engine bay, this is your Supreme Leader, I need more power, NOW.  Heart rate increases, ready for the increase....nothing.  It's only then that I notice Bob's gap growing.  I NEED MORE POWER NOW!!!   The Captain of the Engine Bay, shaking his head, tries to open the tap, until KA-BLOOEY!  Engine shrapnel litters the roadway.  Pistons, connecting rods, valves all heaped in a twisted, smokey, flaming mess.  I can't remember the last time I blew up to this degree.  Holyman.

Just past the final hairpin, and Bob's nowhere in sight.  Gone.  He's already enjoying the burgers and pop!

It's only after I download my Garmin to analyze the effort that I realized that I may have been in the red for uhm, a little too long.  My mate Bob takes the spoils today.

Did I mention that Bob Welbourn is the current National Cyclocross Champion?  Damn, he's fit.